Want to read an excerpt? Well, I'm only allowed to show you two (dern contracts!). Here's the two: "My Grits" and "My Food Stamp of Rejection". If you want to read about Turdboy, Dating Urban Chicken Farmers for Meals, or How to Whip Someone's Booty in Walmart, you'll have to buy the book. (and remember this stuff is all true, so try not to laugh too hard at me!)

Ready to order the book? Thank you! Get thee to Amazon and place an order or ask for it by name at your local bookstore. If they don't have it, please ask them to order it for you!

*Under permanent construction (I'm working 12 hour days now, cut me some slack): A visual guide to the book.

So, hurry and order it, or you'll feel left out like you did when Bill Cosby did "Picture Pages" and you didn't have the pictures or the pages!!! (only those 24 and up will get that, I suppose.)